"I am at peace"

This song is dedicated to 2015.  Happy new year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Feeling Good"
Nina Simone

Birds flyin' high, you know how I feel
Sun in the sky, you know how I feel
Breeze driftin' on by, you know how I feel
It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me.
Yeah, it's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me, ooooooooh...
And I'm feelin' good.

Fish in the sea, you know how I feel
River runnin' free, you know how I feel
Blossom on the tree, you know how I feel
It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me,
And I'm feelin' good

Dragonfly out in the sun, you know what I mean, don't you know,
Butterflies all havin' fun, you know what I mean.
Sleep in peace when day is done: that's what I mean,
And this old world is a new world and a bold world for me...

Stars when you shine, you know how I feel
Scent of the pine, you know how I feel
Yeah, freedom is mine, and I know how I feel..
It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me

And I'm feelin'... good.

Food for Thought

"...if you stop trying to make yourself into more than you are out of fear that you are less than you are, whoever you really are will be a lot lighter and happier, and easier to live with, too." 

-Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn, page 239

om mani padme hum

Merry Christmas / mele kalikimaka / feliz navidad to you all! <3

-Bora

This daydream is dangerous.

12/9/14

After traveling for the past 2-3 weeks to butwal, pokhara, Kathmandu, and back to dang, I was feeling so many emotions and my body and mind were literally all over the place.  As I sat on the bus heading back to my village, I wasn’t sure how I felt. I was excited to be in my own room, no longer living in hotels (at least for a little while) and I knew I was excited to see the two little girls that live with me at my home.  But as per usual, I was nervous.  I was nervous at the homecoming I might endure, nervous because I lost my host-family’s phone number and couldn’t warn them I was coming home today, and nervous to resettle into a semi-isolated village life.

Living in village is an interesting experience because I am constantly surrounded by people, but none of whom speak the same language as I.  Because of this, I can feel both socially exhausted and isolated.

That was kind of a tangent, but anyways, yes there I was, nervous, excited, and exhausted.  I got off the bus, closed my eyes for a second, swallowed a big breath, and threw on my two backpacks and started on my walk home from the bus stop. 

The whole walk home was a daze. My mind was everywhere! The sun had just set and there was little light outside.  I hadn’t been able to contact my host-family because I broke my phone and lost their numbers, so I couldn’t warn them of my arrival. My backpacks were so heavy (as were my eyes).  As I approached my home, I slowly and as quietly as I could opened the front gate and walked down our small pathway.  I entered the front door and the lights were on inside (also meaning the electricity was on, woo!!) but everyone was tucked away into their own separate bedrooms.  I could hear their small murmurs but I wasn’t sure if they had heard me enter, so I yelled out a gentle, “HELLO”.  The patter of footsteps began and as I was struggling to open my door lock in the dark, I heard a door open and a small voice yell, “FUPU!!!!!!!!” (fupu means dad’s sister in nepali).  I turned to see my two-year old nani (baby girl) dancing and yelling and running and falling. I took off my bags as quickly as I could with all its attachments around me, and picked up my nani and hugged and hugged her.  Soon after, the rest of my host-family came down stairs and greeted me.  It was one of the most meaningful homecomings I’ve ever received. 

All my reasons to be nervous were relinquished. I was back home after a long and wearisome journey, and I could feel calm inside myself again. 

Later that night I received two packages from home (like REAL Cali home), one from Joy Joy and one from Chodey Lee!  I couldn’t have felt more blessed. 

Joy Joy: Your loyalty, empathy, understanding, and relentless kindness has meant so much to me and has touched me in so many ways.  More than just the small snacks (which are powerful pick-me-ups, no doubt), your continuous kind words remind me to be kind and strong, especially on the days when I feel frustration, anger, and general loathing towards the world.  You are an incredible person and role model. Thank you for the holiday cheer.

Chodey Lee: I don’t have to search very far when I think about how much you’ve done for me (and for others).  Since I was a small peanut you and your family have been that extra support system I needed to get to where I am today.  I’m so thankful to know that after all these years I can still come back home and find a friend in you (and a very good one at that).  I hope one day I can show you how much you mean to me as you’ve done for me. I can’t wait to join you for your wedding, and I miss you a butt-ton!!!!

All in all, the motivating reason for me to post these words is this thought/question that I face every morning when I wake up.  If you know me well (or even the slightest), you know I sleep, everywhere.  I love sleep! And I’m generally just sleepy, often.  And although I can fall asleep in trains, at concerts, on cement floors, or even on top of speakers, I prefer sleeping in a nice, warm, cozy bed.  I’m lucky enough to own a nice and comfortable bed in my room here.  So the question is, why would someone who loves to sleep in a nice and comfortable bed wake up in the morning to get out and face the challenge that is the world outside? 

And on many occasions, it’s still a question without an answer, but today I feel I’ve found a decent one.  This past year in Nepal (and honestly the year before when I was in the United States as well) has been hard.  Many days were hard enough that I no longer enjoyed getting out of bed.  This was crazy to me because I have fond memories of me as a child when I couldn’t wait to wake up.  I remember I truly LOVED life.  I loved it to the point that I would wake up before my alarm and just wait there until it rang so I could jump out and start my beautiful day.  These memories in comparison with my more recent experiences were cause for questioning.  When and why has my love for “being awake” ceased?  Why don’t I jump out of bed anymore, but rather, press snooze then snooze again until I can’t hold my pee any longer and have to get out to use the bathroom?  Will I ever love life again, the same way I used to as a child?

I was beginning to lose hope (perhaps I did lose it for a little bit), but last night and this morning reminds me that, yes, I can learn to LOVE life again, just as I had when I was a child.  As I grew into my 20-something year old self, I became an over-thinker, a worrier, a critic- someone who couldn’t shake away the reality of disaster and destruction in the world.  I’ve always been an empathetic child, but my empathy began to translate in unhealthy ways as I grew older.  If someone else was in grief or pain, I too deserved to feel such grief and pain.  The problem is, there will always be someone experiencing pain on any given day.  The reality however, is that pain can dissipate, and happiness and joy and general good cheer is also a part of the reality of the world.  As I grew older with my “skill” of empathy, I began to forget the good parts of life and began to focus on the troubles.  I began to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, and I refused to let it go. 

But I think it’s about time for me to let it go. 

Always learning,

Bora

to be victorious

You must find glory in the little things.
You'll find a greater love in the little things.
-Janelle Monae

I'm on my way back to my village from Kathmandu where I stayed for a week to complete my mid-service training (MST). The final training after MST is Close of Service Conference (COS) which will most likely take place next July or August.

I'm looking forward to spending time with my naniharu (baby girls) at home in village and throwing a Christmas party at my health post. Hopefully I can figure out a way to bake some cakes without an oven.

Thanksgiving also passed a few weeks ago. I hope everyone had a nice thanksgiving and didn't kill too many turkeys ;).

Hi

Holy moly am I computer illiterate or what?? I mean look at the size of those photos geezzz laweezz. I thought they were going to be smaller, my apologies everyone. I'm also embarrassed that you all can see my face so enlarged. Eeep,

Anyways, shout out to UCLA. I see your sweater walking around in a bazaar in little ol' Dang, Nepal. Oakland is also well represented out here on a popular sweater.  Who would've known we were so internationally known? ;)

-Bowa

Cambodia pictures- a brief and overdue update

Hi everyone,

I'm here in Tulsipur bazaar, having finished a piece of roti and milk tea for breakfast.  I'm waiting for my counterpart (aka Nepali friend) to call me then we will be on our way to work on the production of more improved cook stoves for village families.  Improved cook stoves replace open mud stoves --which produces an unhealthy amount of smoke-- with mud stoves that have chimneys attached.  With the attachment of a chimney, smoke should find its way up and outside the home rather than filling the lungs of the cooks.

I don't have much to say right now.
Just sorta bored so I felt I should update those who read this blog.

Shout out to Miss Dung Lana Phi for the care package that arrived yesterday for me! I didn't realize how much I love Goldfish crackers until yesterday. Thank you so much for the munchies; I'll eat them well, I promise! And hopefully I will ration it so it's not gone by the end of this week.

These are well overdue, but here are some photos of my trip to Cambodia back in July 2014.

Stay classy my loves.


-Bora

On my bus ride today

On my bus ride from Butwal to Kathmandu...

a pig crossed the highway,
later a family of ducks,
then we passed a tribe of monkeys,
but before that we passed an elephant,
then I watched a lady carrying a very large bag of stuff using the side of her face,
then we passed a man beating a lady on the head,
and we forgot our bus conductor at a bus stop,
but he hitched a ride with a pick up truck and caught up to us and jumped back on,
then I almost got left behind after our lunch stop because I eat so slow,
and early on we passed a dead dog,
then at the tail end of our trip we passed another dead dog,
and we crossed the london bridge (said the nepali sign),
and I ate a cucumber from a street vendor,
and just before we entered Kathmandu we were passed up by a motorcycle gang with go-pro cameras on their helmets.

Definitely different from my bus rides in the United States.

they'll never love you like I can!

Oh Sam Smith.... anyways.

Today is the last day of the 5 day festival known as Tihar, or Dipawali.  The first day was kaag puja (worship of the crow), the second kukur puja (doggy worship), the third day laxmi puja and gai puja (the god Laxmi and cow worship), the fourth day is dedicated to goro puja (male cow worship… is that an ox?), and today was bhaai tikaa (day to celebrate our brothers).

Thus, to make a tie back home, happy bhaai tikaa to my own blood brothers, Reynold and Antonio! I love you two and sending you malas and saptarang tikaa on your forehead.  But yall are supposed to give me money in return, so I’ll be waiting for that.

PPS- speaking of $$, congratulations on my little brother for getting himself a job. Make money for the three of us!!!

Now back to Tihar.  It is definitely my most favorite holiday of all the holidays celebrated in Nepal (and trust, there are a lot of holidays).  It’s sorta like Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Fourth of July combined in one holiday over the span of 5 days.  There’s lots of different types of roti and other sweets made and eaten, lots of dancing and music, “Christmas” lights put up on houses, fireworks being set off (at some places- I didn’t see any), and dogs running around with flowers around their necks.  So great.

However, I must admit, after all the celebrations finished today, I began to feel berry homesick.  The holiday feel makes me miss my own family, my mama, my brothers, and my friends. I was zoning out at dinner today just thinking about home.  It’s exciting to know I only have one year left until I’ll be able to see everyone again, but it does hurt a little knowing it’ll have been beyond 2 years since I last saw my friends, family, and mama.  I’m gonna sleep on it, but I was contemplating coming back home to visit for the Christmas holidays this year, for about 2 weeks.  I mean, I’ll have to figure out my money situation, but seeing everyone for a bit before the end of another full year would be nice, no? I’ll sit on it.

Sending my love <3

God bless Cali and Nepal! :)

-Bora

10/17/14

On the other side of adoption

Today I traveled around to a new part of my district that I’ve never been to before.  I was walking around with a dear didi (“elder sister”) of mine, Sayni.  We were reconnecting with homes that Sayni had previously asked to create bricks so we could help teach and build them improved cookstoves inside their homes (mud stoves with chimneys so that there is less smoke inside the kitchen area).  We were sitting inside the home of a friend of Sayni’s, and speaking to the father of the home (or I think he was the father). 

He began to share the story of how he had a daughter, but when she was about 1 ½ years old he sent her away to Germany to be adopted.  This part of the story was a little lost in translation, but either he is not the biological father and the baby’s parents had passed away, thus, causing him to send her away for adoption, or he is the biological father and for whatever reason felt he had to send her away for adoption. 

Anywho, he said he met her a year earlier in Kathmandu (Nepal’s capital city).  She was around the age of 21.  She could only speak German and English, and the father expressed the fact that she could not understand any Nepali or tharu (his native tongue). 

I have met many friends and people in my life who are adoptees, or are adopters, but I haven’t been very close to any families who had to send away a family member to become adopted.  It was so interesting to be speaking the same language as a father who had to send his daughter away.  It was interesting speaking to him, understanding the reasons that drove him to make such a decision, and trying to comprehend the emotions he must have felt when he saw her again.  It’s interesting to understand their lifestyle; to be their neighbor. 

Very interesting stuff.

10.18.14

In the same village today I walked passed a home where loud grieving could be heard from the road.  Sayni asked the neighbor what had happened, and the eldest son had just passed away from typhoid.  He was 18 years old and was just married a month prior.  I never realized how grave the danger of typhoid is, and it was sad to hear about the death of someone at such a prime age.  The wife is now a widow, and although she can remarry, in the Nepali village context she becomes quite undesirable as a potential wife.  I hope that because she is so young she will still have the potential to re-marry if she wishes.

10.19.14

Life's all about changes, isn't it?

In the Peace Corps Nepal world, group 199 who came to Nepal back in 2012 is packing up and setting off for their travels back stateside.  On the flip side, group 201 who just came into country this past September got their permanent site announcements and will be setting off to their permanent sites soon in the far-west region of Nepal and the west region (I'm situated in the mid-west region, between the west and far-west).  And.... I'm still here at site, living my village life; going through waves of excitement, fear, anxiety, relaxation, and dull....ness. Ke garne?  

Loving you all to infinity and beyond! muah muah.

-Bora

Dashain

Happy belated Dashain, or dashain ko shuba kamana.

Dashain is the largest and longest holiday of the year for Nepalis of the hindu religion where for 15 days people travel out of the urban spots (Kathmandu, Pokhara, perhaps Butwal) to return to their village homes and spend time with their families. In my village, lots of goats were murdered, marinated, and eaten, and lots of tikaa was thrown (and lots of paisaa given away with blessings from elders/superiors).

It's a big deal for nepalis.
As for Americans living in Nepal, after doing some research I've found a common trend is doing much of nothing (beyond reading or watching things).
It's been a long couple of days of sitting around, but it was also nice to see some hustle and bustle on the dirt roads and spirits up.

Happy dashain mero saathiharu <3

September

The past couple of days/weeks have been very atypical from the village life. I celebrated my birthday with my host family in Manpur, then headed out to Kathmandu, making a stop in butwal along the way, and finally went to Bhakundebesi, Kavre, to the PST training site where group 201 was learning all about the ways of Nepal and Nepali language to kick start their service.

Reflecting chronologically, my birthday celebration in my village was a lot of fun. I gave out "pursad" or prayer food to some of my neighbors and my family decked me out in red tikaa and fed me my pujaa food (worship food) in honor of my "janma din" (birthday). I felt very appreciated and loved. :)

Next, butwal! Butwal is known to travelers as a travel stop in between destinations.  It is not known to be a city where foreigners go out of their way to see, but rather just spend a quick night and carry on in their travels.  Us PCVs understood this behavior quickly, as butwal can be dusty, loud, busy, with not many traveler delights to offer. However, this time around I discovered a swimming pool at a very nice hotel, coffee at a new shop called Game Zone, and I got the luxury of staying at Darcy's International Hotel, one of the much nicer hotels in the area (if not the nicest) because I was traveling for official Peace Corps duty. yippeeeee. It was a good night.

Next, Kathmandu! I got to spend my actual birthday in the capital, and met with Marvin, a volunteer for group 199 who's birthday is also on 9/11.  It was nice to celebrate our birthdays together, and with our other friends who were in the area.

Next.... Bhakundebesi, Kavre, aka N201's PST site.  I, with Jewels, another PCV in my group originally from Chicago, taught the new group about gender considerations in Nepal and assisted our safety and security coordinator on the sessions on sexual assault awareness. Although we had to talk about some heavy topics, it was a fun time getting to know the new PCTs (Peace Corps Trainees), and a lot of them are from California! woohooo!

Also, Nikki Bose- this is so random but Jewels and I were chatting and I realized she also went to Walter Payton in Chicago!! Cool.

Now I'm back in Kathmandu for a few days before I head back to Dang to spend some quality family time with my village people. It's the holidays in Nepal, Dashain and Tihar are coming up (sorta like thanksgiving and Christmas in USA). Looking forward to a good time.

Hope everyone is taking care out there. Thinking of you folks back home :)
I also hope all is going well in San Diego with the ceremonies dedicated to Bernadette.

-Bora

to Bernadette

This one goes out to you Bernadette.
Dance with freedom and rest in peace.

Happy birthday to my September 11th birthday twins Marvin (Peace Corps), Bryce (Del Mar), and Nikko (UCSD).

And to the day of remembrance for what happened on 9/11/01.

With love,
Bora

8/28/14

After a fabulous trip in Kathmandu, I am back in beautiful Manpur, Dang.  There was news of great floods in the area, wiping out homes, crops, livestock, and unfortunately lives as well.  I was expecting a swimming pool around my home when I got back, but luckily everything seemed safe and sound, just greener and more fireflies present at nighttime.  Please pray for all the homes and lives that were affected by the floods that have injured numerous families, to whichever god, goddess, or gods that may be.

It’s been a while since I last posted due to traveling and trainings and birthday celebrations, but here are a few updates on my village life:

1.        The moringa tree I planted at home is growing! YES!!!!

2.       However, the area around the moringa tree is infested with “goat lice” as said by my bhaauju (sister-in-law).

3.       I wiped a two year old’s butt with my hand after she went dookie in our backyard area. J

4.       Today we celebrated teej!  I fasted with the ladies until the evening, danced (Nepali style), wore my loud, green sari with rangichangi bangles to go with, and ate bananas, doi (it’s yogurt-esk), and sabdaanaa (some flour milky porridge thang).  Today was a good day, overall.

In a couple of days I will reach my ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY of living in Nepal. AMAZING.  It’s said by many a PCV (Peace Corps Volunteer), but the days are long and the weeks/months go by fast.  I can’t believe I’ve made it this far (thank you Jesus- definitely couldn’t have made it without you).  Looking ahead, I’m excited to meet the new groups, the first landing in KTM around September 6^th (I think) and the next coming in March of 2015.  WOO, more English-speaking satiharu (friends)!  I believe it is also a proper time to reflect on the many nice moments I’ve had in Nepal thus far:

1.       Learning to play guitar by candlelight after a long day.

2.       Brushing my teeth outside overlooking hundreds of fireflies nearby and in the distance.

3.       Riding my bike until I find a shady spot to read a good book (I READ!).

4.       Orange is the New Black! I’m not good at following shows, so it’s been nice to have the opportunity to commit to following one (and a very interesting one at that).

Now what’s a good list without its counterpart- some of the not-as-nice stuff that’s happened in Nepal:

1.       Moldy vole poop under my bed.

2.       Mold.

3.       Giardia.

4.       Hairy armpits.

Friends and family, you are all still welcome to visit Nepal.  I’ve got 1.25 years to go! Love you all- sending big kisses and hugs. Don’t get married without me! J

Love,

Bora

July 30th, 2014

So, remember that last post about the mosquitoes?

I think the mosquitoes read my blog and recruited their entire country of mosquitoes into my home.

In other words, my legs are gonna look so scarred and nasty by the time I get home.  Sorry mama, I’m ugly!!!

J In other news, I’ll be traveling a lot these next two months to our capital Kathmandu for training as a resource volunteer for the incoming group, N201.  Traveling within this country is just about my least favorite thing about Nepal (I’d much rather stay around in my village than travel all the time), but I’m looking forward to getting to know Kathmandu much better and work with some of the other PCVs I don’t get to see often as well as staff.  And, my friend Sanjuana will be in country around that time as well. Yeeyeyeyeeyeyeeyeyee.

Love,

Bora

Calm, rainy day

Today is a rainy Saturday in Manpur, Dang.  It is monsoon season, which I was told was going to entail rainy nights and sunny-ish days, however this season has been playing out differently than most years, the villagers have said.  The rain was expected to begin in June, yet most of June was very hot and dry.  Now that the rain has started to make its way through our part of the country, it is still less of a downpour than what was expected. However, today after 11am the rain has been consistent.  As it is my “weekend”, or one day off, it’s been very nice and calming hearing the rain outside my room while I relax and read my book.

Sweet segway Bora.  What book am I reading you ask? It’s a book I purchased while on vacation in Cambodia, and the title is “first they killed my father”.  It is a memoir of one child’s account of what happened to her and her family during the Khmer Rouge regime and genocide of the Cambodian people.  During this period of time, around 2 million people died, out of a total population of 8 million people. I’m almost finished with the book (plan on finishing it today), and I must say, it is quite the emotional ride. Her story is powerful and the events her and her family endured and survived through are beyond my imagination. If you are in need or curious of a reality check on genocide, I recommend this book strongly.

Now, back to Nepal. I heard word of a school settled just 1-2 kilometers behind my home that houses orphans of the People’s War that occurred in Nepal just a few years back.  This morning I decided to pay the school a visit and introduce myself to the staff and students there.  There are about 400 students residing at the school, and when I showed up there were kids playing soccer, doing, laundry cooking, eating, and farming.  They were scattered and running around busy all over the place.  I was very impressed and quite overwhelmed at all the work that needed to be done around the school in order for it to function effectively, but overall the children seemed quite settled in.  The school opened up 5 years ago and has a staff of 15 teachers.  I sat with a group of about 25-30 teenage girls and compared life in America to life in Nepal for them.  They asked me to sing America’s national anthem, but after my first attempt my voice cracked, I got shy, and bailed out. I ask them to sing me the Nepali national anthem.  This was quite a magical moment in my life as all 25-30 young ladies began singing their country’s anthem with pride and in unison.  It was amazing!! I applauded and gawked with astonishment at how beautiful they all sang.  They pressured me to sing America’s national anthem once more, and I made it through the song half way until I stumbled on a line and started laughing at myself.  They responded with warmth.  Then they told me to dance, and then I left haha.  However, I left on the promise that I would return and dance not FOR them, but WITH them.

Lastly, an update on the poop status.  Knock on wood, but everything has been going pretty well nowadays in that department of my life.  I think I’ve swallowed my fair share of bacteria finally and my body has adapted to most of the diarrhea-causing particles in the food and water I eat.  Still gotta be careful around the chowmein down the street and the goat meat at weddings though.

Additionally, today I have been a mosquito killing machine, thank you, thank you, yes, I am quite proud of myself.  The house, charpi (squat toilet), and bathroom are all densely populated with mosquitoes these days, but I think the house mosquitoes are tired of my blood and have gotten used to my company.  I don’t get eaten up as badly as I used to. Yippee!

<3 Everything is going well on my side of the world.  I hope everyone I know and love is taking care of themselves out there!

Sincerely,

Da stink aka bora 

Back at it

I’m back in Nepal now after my trip to Cambodia.

Highlights of Cambodia:

1.       Angkor (Wat, but as well as all the other temples that comprises this awesome, ancient civilization). Definitely one of the world’s great wonders. I don’t think I could talk it up enough. Something everyone should try to go see at some point in their lives. Only annoyances/downfalls were some of the sales children who walk you up to each temple trying to get you to buy something (but in my opinion some of their items were for prices better than the city) and the food I ate for lunch was my only “meh” meal of the whole trip.

2.       The tonle sap floating village near Siem Reap. We joined a tour group for $39 per person which provided a bike ride through a countryside village, a boat ride, lunch at a home in the floating village, a tour of the floating village, and local snacks along the way. It was a nice venture and a new perspective of how one’s life could be lived.

3.       The Killing Fields Memorial Site near Phnom Penh and the tuol sluong a.k.a. S-21 memorial site. It is strange to call this day a “highlight”, but learning about the genocide which occurred during the Khmer Rouge regime was necessary, and taught me a lot about the somewhat recent history of Cambodia. The country overall seems to be making a grand recovery from the tragedy, but nevertheless it was an honor to take part in remembering the lives that were lost.

Mishaps of the trip:

1.       We tried to make a trip to Sihanoukville, home to the tourist-y beachside of Cambodia, but hit major major traffic in Phnom Penh and made the choice to jump off the bus and not waste more time sweating our buns off in the stalled traffic. One day I shall meet you beach!

2.       Some jerk on a motorcycle tried to steal my purse while I was walking back to my hotel from dinner. Luckily my purse broke and the he only got away with the strap. Be careful while traveling, especially my ladies out there! If you can avoid it, don’t rock a handbag or purse but instead use pant pockets or a fannypack maybe.

That’s all for Cambodia. Overall a good trip in a beautiful country. The Khmer people we met in general were very pleasant.

Back to Nepal! J

thinking of you

Missing you all back at home.

<3 Bora

getting ready for vacation

After ten months of working and living in Nepal, I'll be taking my first out of country vacation to... Cambodia! I'm very excited and getting all my current commitments prepared for my departure.

If anyone has any experience, lessons learned, comments, questions, or advice to give about Cambodia please do share.

I'll be out of country from July 7th to July 17th. Praying for safe travels! :)

-Bora

aaayeeee namaste

Hi all,

How's everyone doing out there in your respective worlds? I'm hanging out in my village, chipping away at small doable projects to implement in my squeezy lil manpur gaou. I'm working on improved cookstoves (mud stoves that have a chimney so the smoke ain't hanging around inside no mo'), teaching health/ nutrition/ sanitation classes at my local e-school, and spreading word about da TREE OF LIFE aka moringa tree or shitalcheene in nepali. Also doing other peace corps duties by attending ngo/community orgs/districtlevel meetings and programs. The life. :)

I've been reading like a brain maniac. It's been real good. Here's a short booklist I recommend when y'all got freetime (or get yourselves off dem streets and go read a book!)

Unbought and Unbossed by Shirley Chisholm
-a firsthand account of the life of Shirley Chisholm, the first African American hot mama to run for presidency.

Buddha in the Attic
-the voices of hundreds of Japanese women sent to America as picture brides in the early 20th century, leading into the internment of Japanese Americans by the US government during World War II.  Short and good read :)

Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? By Beverly Tatum
-a psychologist's perspective of racial identity development in the USA. Iz berry interesting.

Mountains Beyond Mountains by Tracy Kidder
-a biography that follows the work of American Dr. Paul Farmer into the slums of Haiti and other regions of the world. An interesting perspective on social inequality and what maybe should or can be done to be a positive addition to the world.


Shout out to my dope lil brother Antonio Lee!! For becoming the final college graduate of the Lee family. Again, as I was for Reynold, I'm there in spirit screaming your weird name and holding a sign with your big fat face on it. Have a safe "tour" up north with my baby (aka my car) and reyrey.

Congratulations to the UCSD class of 2014 for finishing out your last painful week of finals and moving on towards life after college. Do wonderful things for your communities, the world, and each other. I'm so proud of so many of you all and I absolutely wish I could see some specifics walk across the stage. You know who you are!! (ie. Bun sistaz and friends to name a few).

To the incoming group of new volunteers into Nepal, G201, I'm very excited to meet you all! Enjoy your last few months in the coffee-laden world of the US and make sure to eat all the burgers, mexican, thai, italian, greek cuisine you can stuff down. Go easy on the white rice while you have a chance ;). Shoot me a comment or message to say namaste if you'd like. I'm nice a good amount of the time.

Ta-ta for now mero maya lageko sathiharu ra pariwaar.
-Bora

La

My computer and iPad mini are of no more for now.  Will update with further information later. Or contact me via facebook message/email (namaste.bora@gmail.com) for info!

MUAH!!


love love love,
Bora

5/5/14 Happy Cinco de Mayo

“This one goes out to all my haters. Thanks for making me feel like the greatest- btch I'm about to blow up.”

Blow up- J.Cole

One thing I can never cease to be thankful for is the incredible view of the stars and the moon in the sky at night. It's a view unparalleled when growing up in light-polluted cities your whole life. Interestingly now I'm nostalgic for the rooftop of the first home I settled in after my move to Nepal- the beautiful village known as Chhaap.

I'm continuing my life along the tracks of the Peace Corps rollercoaster. I'm not one to butter stories up, so I must admit that some days/nights living here have been absolutely terrible- sometimes miserable physically (diarrhea, dehydration, mosquitoes, the heat, the cold, the physical labor), sometimes mentally (language, trainings, understanding policy, learning new skills), sometimes emotionally (loneliness, boredom, frustration, fear), but usually caused by the exhaustion of all of the above. Yet as with most lives lived on Earth, there is a balance, and I can't fail to recognize that there has been many days/nights here in Nepal that have presented to me opportunities for which I am terribly undeserving and very grateful. Life here as a foreigner, as a woman, as a volunteer, as a 23 year old, as an Asian-American, has presented challenges I never could have prepared for in the States, but I dare to never forget that this experience is an adventure I pursue willingly and joyfully, regardless of what happens.

In this life we must face the unique challenges set before us and find the means to make our way through life in the manner we each uniquely believe in.

I miss home, the Bay Area and the San Diego area, constantly, and most likely will be yearning for my hometown until the end of this tour, but I am looking up at the present and doing my best to embrace every minute of it while seeing the future on the horizon.

I'm doing my best. I'm learning everyday, breaking down to be put back together, and discovering new potential within myself and within others.

These mosquitoes bites are seriously fire though and I can't stop itching. FML.

MUAH!

-Bora

Easter

Happy Belated Easter everyone!

I remember celebrating Easter in a variety of ways back in the States: going to SCUM (Santa Clara [Korean] United Methodist) and getting fed a huge, delicious Korean BBQ lunch after service, or going to our cousin's house when we were kids and participating in an extreme egg hunt, or.... actually those are the only two memories I can conjure up at the moment.

I've always been, or at least continue to aspire to be, an activist behind the idea, “never be ashamed of who you are”. Because Hindu is the dominate religion in Nepal, I find joy here in telling others about my Christian background and faith because it empowers me to speak up for myself and my God. Since there is a small majority out here who are Christian, I wonder if they feel marginalized at times in their daily lives because the Hindu religion is so integrated into the culture. I assume so.

Recognizing Easter while I'm living and serving in Nepal was important to me this year because I'm reminded in several different ways the cost of Peace Corps service to me and my life up until now, and how much of what complimented my identity in the USA was left behind in the USA. It's the simple things, such as knowing every Sunday I had the freedom to go to church for a few hours and remind myself of my spirituality if during the week I got a little too caught up with school, work, friends, or other parts of my life. It was a freedom I didn't recognize until it was gone.

And so, how did I celebrate this year? Well, I was nursing an intense diarrhea episode (my life was almost lost to this mess, or so it felt like it, no joke) and thought it best to stay at home (didn't want to get caught open defecating on the road, ya feel) and try my first attempt at baking a cake using a pressure cooker. It took two tries, the first one being the ULTIMATE fail where instead of baking a pretty yellow cake I created a black rock. However on the second try I remembered to check early and check often and taaa-daaaa, gold! I was so excited since I'm no baker- the extent of my baking career back at home was buying those funfetti cake mixes. I had my Nepali host family pose with the cake and I explained to them a little bit about why we celebrate Easter. Then we ate it, after the ants of course.

Anywho, here's my Easter post. Hope everyone in California and elsewhere had a smashing one.

Lava,

Bora

PS- I'll explain the new diarrhea, ant, spider, and mosquito situation in the next post. xoxoyoloxoxo

First Fund-raiser

http://www.youcaring.com/help-a-neighbor/move-over-manchester-united-we-re-ready-for-our-own-team-/163210


Copy and paste the url above and check out the latest fundraiser.  Any small donation would be of great help and would be extremely appreciated!

Legs on Fire

April 8, 2014

If Nepal has malaria, I think I'm a good candidate for a test sample. Mosquito season has informally arrived and my legs are on fiiiiire! Mero kuttaharu mastai chilaiiyo. These little suckers are everywhere and so tiny they've made my legs all red and lumpy like the chicken pox.

On a brighter note, good morning everyone! Today is a beautiful day and the weather has been so very warm here in Dang. Because we are so far south and flat we are a lot warmer than the middle hills and mountain regions of the country. It's hot during the day but it's also that warm summer night feel when the sun goes down; truly one of the best experiences in the worrrrld.

Concerning care packages, I no longer need a guitar capo! A lovely friend here took the liberty to buy me one just yesterday. I'm extremery excited to get this guitar thing going. I'm getting my first song down and it sounds like poopy holaa but it's music: it's reviving and I love it. However, if any of you amazzzzing friends and family of mine are thinking about sending a care package, I would diiie of happiness (it's true). Because of all the moving and confusion with my postal address I haven't been able to receive packages since October (2013) and all the luxury Americano food from that package has been looong gone. I can send you cute cheap Nepali stuff and love in return!! :)

Things that have hit my face this week:

1. Tobacco/betal leaf(?) spit out from the window on a bus. It was one of those, “There he goes to spit... and there's the spit on my face,” moments.

2. Cow poop a.k.a. da gobar. My bhaauju, or sister-in-law, and I were making compost at my house yesterday and I had gathered a bunch of fresh green leaves with my mom to add to the pile. I saw my bhaauju coming in with the watery mixture of gobar and I asked (in Nepali), “Don't we have to cut up the green leaves into small pieces?”. She said yes and threw the gobar mix all over the green leaves. Then we started breaking them into smaller pieces. Basically, there was absolutely no science behind the method of adding cow poop before chopping the leaves because then we had to chop cow poopy leaves, which splashed cow poop everywhere, such as in my mouth, in my eyes, the facial works.

3. Vomit..... just kidding not yet but you know I'll let ya'll know when that happens! ;)

Man this post is RANDOM, which I know I'm infamous for so I'll just keeping being random.

Anywho, now on a more sentimental note, I met a beautiful Nepali girl a while ago when I first moved into Manpur, Dang (my permanent site), and I have been keeping in touch with her ever since. She lives in our district capital, which is a popping, urban bazaar area, to study at school there. Every time I make my way out to the district capital I make sure to give her a call and stop by and see her. Sometimes we go for loooong walks to see different nearby Hindu or Buddhist temples (this little girl can walk for days without water or complaint), and sometimes we go to her room and hang out and chat. She has a beautiful heart and is one of those people you can't help but be thankful to have met. The other day she took myself and a friend of mine on one of her long walks to a nearby (but far away) temple. It was during this walk that she said something very sweet that I had no idea about. When she was a young girl both her parents had passed away from HIV/AIDS (I'll try to develop on her story in another post). She told my friend about this fact of life and said on those days when she is down and really missing her parents, she calls me and talks to me over the phone and she feels better. When I overheard her say this, that slow, small, trickling tear started to fall down my face (I was in front of the group so I don't think anyone saw). I had no idea that she thought of me in that way, but it's been an amazing relationship we've been able to build. She's my little Nepali sister here, bringing meaning to my service in Nepal and in my life, while I'm her older American sister. I'm hopeful that I can be just as meaningful to her as she is to me.

Now, on to soccer! As some of you may know, I've been trying to build a local neighborhood soccer team in my village to give the boys a sense of leadership, responsibility, and belonging to a team. This dream to start this team doesn't end with the team itself, but will hopefully lead to a local soccer league where the boys can play other teams from nearby villages if those villages can develop their own teams as well. I wanted to find ways to get the boys a new soccer ball, goalie gloves, field lines, even uniforms if we could fund raise enough money or get enough support. I've already talked to the boys about having regular practices, but a new problem I've been facing is how do I ensure the boys will be responsible with the equipment if it is acquired? I want to know that the boys are benefiting from this soccer team farther beyond just the physical equipment. I want to know that they are building leadership skills, teamwork attitudes, and that this team is helping to foster a thoughtful group of youth who may one day lead this country (big hopes, but it can happen).

Thoughts? Questions? Suggestions?? I'll take 'em all.

Lastly, I finished reading The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell and I began noticing “tipping points” in my life and in my self. The idea of the book is that there are natural “tipping points” caused by certain people, certain environments, and certain ideas that can tip an event over into becoming an epidemic. After a lot of self-reflection, as Peace Corps service is often a time and place that provides many self-reflection opportunities, I've noticed circumstances and situations that may have the power to tip me over into taking action, however without that last little incident or push, I may have been comfortable staying in the safety of my comfort zone. This was a lot of abstract talk, but I can't think of a concrete example at the moment. I'll let you know when I do. Just a thought looming around in the hazy brain of Bora that wanted to get posted online for everyone to see.

Okie I'm done for this morning. Off to the garden to plant a few dying and a few lively cucumbers. Love you all!!!!!!!!!!!!

pheri bhetaula mi amors (trilingual wassup)

-Bora

Just another post

I'm keeping busy with the reporting part of the job, finishing up my first draft of my VSA, or Village Situational Analysis, and my VRF, Volunteer Report Form (?).

Today in our kitchen as we ate our daal bhaat we were faced with new challenges that come along with the new warmer season, and the fact that our goat gave birth.  The battle began as we smacked around continuously to keep the new influx of flies (x34958769230840853e) off our food. Why are the flies not afraid of humans?  Then the two new baby goaties kept coming into the kitchen, also trying to get at our food. Cute goats, but they eat everything you don't want them to be eating.  It's always fun to compare Nepali home to California home and think, "why are there goats in the kitchen?". Ah the joyful varieties of life.

Overall, today was a very uplifting day.  I woke up and decided to go for a run through my village, as I occasionally do when I can bare the stares.  I'm thankful for that decision because as I began to cut across the khet (crop fields) I was stopped by a very kind didi (older sister, but she was really a mom) who was interested in me (being "non-Nepali") because her children have talked about me many times before.  Lucky for me, she was a community mobilizer for an NGO that works specifically in my district (kind of like a miniature state).  She told me briefly about some of the work she does and offered to show me around her office some time and have me be a part of the work she does.

........ sweet!

<3

I love my hyphy village.

Happy Holi!

3/17/14

Or to all back at home, Happy St. Patrick's Day. Holi isn't the Nepali equivalent of St. Patrick's Day, but the two holidays happened to land on the same calendar day this year. From what I've heard, Holi is a Hindu holiday celebrated after the gods Vishnu and Radha. Vishnu, a blue skinned god, threw colors at Radha so that they would be of the same color and they fell in love. Thus, Holi is celebrated by destroying other people with tikaa powder of all different colors. There is also a mixture of water balloons, water squirters, eggs, alcohol and beer, and a good ol' angry fight when someone gets too much tikaa to the dome to give the holiday its full atmosphere.

I was quietly working on my nursery bed (I'm working on my green thumb) in the back of my house when I was hazed by a mob of villagers in my gaou (village). I wasn't too eager on participating in the Holi celebrations at first because I wanted to get my nursery bed up and growing. However, after over 100 villagers smacked me around with colorful tikaa powder and cracked 2 eggs on my head, they got me to stop what I was doing and join the festivities. We walked down to the local mandeer (temple) and they yelled, “AMERICAN DANCE!”

I taught them a few good moves, some of the classics like the sprinkler, the disco, the hands and knees move (I don't remember what its called), and some interpretive & improv moves. I'd say the people dug it, but you all will never know since no other American was around to witness.

And now I have tikaa stains all over my face and body because I didn't bathe quick enough. I have a nice solid red mustache too (I hope it never goes away).

With love and tikaa,

Bora

Back at it

Kiss me goodbye, I'm defying gravity

3/13/14

It wasn't until I hit my 6 month mark of living in Nepal that I realized, “This is it”. I have a better understanding of what my work here actually consists of, and a much better understanding of the commitment I made back when I decided to join the Peace Corps. As with many things in life, it's been quite an experience and I could say that it differs from the expectations I had, but as truthful as I can be, I don't think I came with any expectations at all.

I suppose one assumption I did arrive here with that I took for granted was that my safety would be assured. Unfortunately, my safety isn't guaranteed as many things are not guaranteed in life. That is one of the risks of joining the Peace Corps, or running a marathon, or riding a bike, or crossing the street: the risk of the adventure. But whose to say it isn't worth the risk? Perhaps people who suffer the consequences, but one will never know until he or she tries. Disclaimer: no I'm not dead; I am perfectly fine.

Although it should have been obvious to me, it wasn't until now that I realize the sacrifices I've made in deciding to move to Nepal. With the majority of my service remaining ahead of me, I now see what I need to let go of in order to continue forward with this journey. And so, forward into the future I go, letting go of bits and pieces of who I once “was” for who I am to “be”.

With that said, I want to tell all my friends and family back home how gravely important you all are to me in creating who I am and who I want to be. Your love and nourishment mean a lot to me, especially in those days when I feel alone (it happens to all of us, no?).

Sooooo, what I'm tryin' to say eeezz..... letters and care packages?!?!

Just kidding, but the care packages would be niiiice. Your support and small friendly reminders have such a great impact on my well being here (sincerely) and I don't want to do this without you all.

Here's my new official address, as told by my host-father. My sister-in-law works at the post office, so God-willing, all should work out!

Christine Bora Lee

c/o Kadaga Bahadur Bhandari

Manpur VDC, Ward no. 1

Dang District, Rapti Anchal Nepal

Desirables:

*love letters (with cool facts I should know about things that have happened while away)

*protein bars (SO IMPORTANT)

dried seaweed (not very important)

dried fruit (like banana chips)

-blueberries, cranberries, and raspberries don't exist here either... think: berries and cream.

*whole wheat, whole grain ANYTHING

*brown rice/purple rice/wild grain rice

emergen-C or vitamin C stuff

*guitar capo, guitar learning guides (I bought a saano guitar heh)

The (*) is something I would reallllly like. Also, my room is sort of overloading with stuff and there is no room to put junk, so please no need to send too much stuff/random eeeish!

God bless America, California, and Nepal while he's at it!

Love and Peace upon thy World from,

Bora

PS- If anyone has travel plans to Asia or anywhere, let me know. Anyone down to visit Nepal is more than welcomed. (Come to me.)

boom boom pow. punch wack jab smack! the fight continues.

I once heard the purpose of life is to get as close to death as possible, without dying. I'm living the dream.

It seems just as I think things "can't get any worse", it definitely can, and does. But hey, we alive and we here. The past is the past, and I'm moving forward into the future. Breathing and alive. Hallelujah for that.

Doing my best. Just gotta make it!

To be honest, this is hard. Any ounce of Inspiration or motivation would help tremendously.

Missing and loving you all my friends and fam.

2/12/14

mangalbaar- Tuesday

Gold is not enough.

I no longer have any clever thoughts to write about in my blog. Womp.

My life is starting to settle into my village.

I drank a big glass of buffalo milk yesterday, as well as a bunch of other shady looking food, and got major diarrhea today to pay for it.

In-Service Training begins in a few days. I'm excited to meet up with all the other volunteers in my group and to catch up on life. Hopefully our conversations won't revolve too much around our work. It's tiresome having the purpose of your life being measured on how many trainings you've accomplished.

I've been playing soccer with the neighborhood kids over the past couple of weeks I've lived here in Manpur. I bought a soccer ball, but the boys managed to pop it and lose it within the ball's first two weeks of life. They also popped their own ball. The boys are very enthusiastic about starting a soccer league within their community. I'm hopeful I can be of some help to start up what would be a great program for the kids while they are not in school. They seem to really love playing soccer, and I see the difference in their attitude and behavior over boys who pursue other extracurricular activities, like being a nuisance around town. I would love to help start a great program for the villagers and the children. But first, we need to somehow raise money for a soccer ball. Suggestions?

Shout out back to home: I hope the snowtrip to Tahoe was a big success for the team. The pictures made it look heeeellla fun and that cabin looked so big and fancy. When'd you all get so fancy?? And grown?? Miss you crazy kids berry much.

What's the latest in the music scene nowadays? I need new music- hollllaaa at me.

With love from the goats of Nepal,

Bora

It's been a while mero satiharu

February 4, 2014

Tuesday/mangalbaar

Hi all, 

It's been a while since I posted something nice and new for all of you to read.  The past couple of weeks have been much of a thrilling and sickening roller coaster.  I'm not sure what I can say that would properly fill you all in on the happenings of my life.  

Gonna keep this one short as I gotta start my day (it's 8am right now) but my current aspiration is to find clarity in my mind by constantly sweeping out superfluous and dusty ramblings.

And my current reflection and prayer for myself, my loved ones, and everyone in between, is to be happy.

I hope you are all finding your happiness.

Permanent Address, Behold!

Christine Bora Lee
c/o Kadega Bhandari
Manpur, Ward No. 1
Manpur VDC, Dang
Nepal

Current Care-package desirables:
dried seaweed sheets (to make sushi!!!)
green tea (bagged or unbagged is bueno)
letters and photos <3
valentine's day cards (to pass out to the children here)
other upcoming holiday stuff (cross-cultural exchange type love)
NEW MUSIC (on a flashdrive perhaps? I don't have a CD socket in my netbook but I could make it work)
a 3-musketeer bar
anything else you think I would lava

Homes in Nepal don't have specific addresses, and so I haven't tested this address out; it's simply what was told to me.  As a precaution, maybe send a postcard first to see if it works and I'll let you know when I receive it? Or if it's a package you send that doesn't cost or burden you too much, let'em rip! The above address should work.

I love you all and I miss being... Californian!
Namaste,
Stinky

1/5/14

January 5^th, 2014

21 Pus, 2070

Sunday

Aaitabaar

I had a lot of funny, weird thoughts and happenings when I wandered and got lost in my VDC (the whole of my village) that I initially wanted to write, but I've been very sick the past couple of days and felt the need to fulfill a Peace Corps goal.

And so, instead of funny stuff, I'm going to enlighten and enrich all of your eager minds to some Nepali culture. Today, or maybe yesterday, was the one year anniversary of the death of my gharbeti baba (house father)'s baba (basically, my grandpa). The many different castes and ethnic groups that make up Nepal all celebrate such an event differently, but all in all, most if not all families recognize this day as very, very significant in their lives.

In the village where I resided for three months of Pre-Service Training, Chhaap, my neighbor's mother had past away and all the sons born from her were required to fast, restrained to eating one meal a day, for 45 days. On the 45^th day, the family threw a bhoj (party/celebration) where many of the neighbors and extended family members were invited to eat and be served different types of “bhoj” food (mostly beaten rice, veggies, and beans).

Here in my permanent village, Manpur, a similar event occurred. My baba told me it was a bhoj, but I was quickly corrected by some of my co-workers at the health post and it's known as something else I couldn't pronounce (I was a little fed up with them so I gave up trying, I'll be honest). My family prepared massive portions of special “word-I-couldn't-pronounce” type food, such as kher (milky rice with coconut bits *yum), haluwa (can't describe it but it's sweet), achaar (spiced potatoes), and roti. It seemed that everyone from our extended family had come to join in on the puja (worship) and the festivities.

After everyone had eaten, received tikaa, and drank tea, the remaining ladies, some of the boys, and I all headed out to the nearby river to send off a final puja tradition down the river in honor of the late grandpa. This was a very joyful ceremony as we sang (we as in they sang and me yelling weird, similar noises), danced, and clapped to the beat of the group's song while walking down to the river and back. As we began our trek home, I had told the group that I've never been a part of such a ceremony and that in the United States we don't conduct such a thing. This is when I began to reflect about this aspect of Nepali culture that I found myself very much appreciating.

In American culture, a person's passing is a deeply mournful ceremony. Everyone is expected to wear black at the funeral as a sign of respect and a sign of loss, all the while much is needed to be discussed concerning property, money, and the late person's will. This is not to say that Nepalis do not mourn, for they certainly feel the same pain and loss when a loved one dies. A difference, however, is that instead of recognizing a deceased friend or family member with a moment of silence, they recognize it with food, the gathering of living family members and friends, and celebration. I was at first conflicted with this tradition, thinking, “Why does a son who's mother just died have to feed me food?” Yet during that walk back home from the river, I saw how joyous the occasion was for the living family members, and how grandpa was still very much alive in memory that day. Even though he had passed a year before, his life had brought everyone back together in honor of him, and they all rejoiced being family and being alive. This is my interpretation and reflection of the ceremony, at least.

La, Peace Corps goal fulfilled.

With ramaailo and maya,

Bora/Stinky/Christine.

January 2^nd, 2014

Happy New Year Everyone!

Today is what I like to think of as a very Nepali day. I had 5 cups of cheeya (and finally witnessed how much sugar is put into one cup... as delicious as 15 cavities) accompanied with several different types of unhealthy biscuits (the stark contrast of being a nutrition volunteer and the food I eat is its own psychological thriller in my head), then watched my nani (baby girl) poop on the floor/ on my sister-in-law's foot as I ate dinner. Did you know a baby's poop is bright yellow? If that's not normal, let me know and I'll tell my family that nani needs to eat something less yellow.

Also, I've been struggling with this abnormal stomach pain and I have no idea what it is. It could be a parasite, holaa, but I'm waiting it out a few days to see if it'll pass on its own.

I apologize if I sound like an idiot, but for future notice I'm going to start throwing in random English vocab words in my writing so that I can practice my English. This is because rather than becoming bi-lingual, I'm starting to feel like I don't know English nor Nepali anymore.

Poor brain.

Namaste til next time,

da sack.