On to the next one

Hi everyone,


On November 3rd, 2015, I officially took a one way ticket out of the mountainous country of Nepal.

I've both triumphed and failed on many occasions over the last two years living in Nepal as a Peace Corps Volunteer. There were days where I felt fully alive, like when I found myself standing under a beautiful starry sky in a jungle in Nepal, and other days when I felt truly alone. I've pushed myself to my limits and beyond, and by doing so I understand better where I have limitations and where I thrive.

I am afraid and excited to return home. I am curious to see what will flower over the next few years. Nevertheless I am excited to be near familiar loved ones, and hopefully stay nearby for some time.

As I wrap up this "new journey", the road continues. Thank you for spending time to come here and read what I had to share about my experience. If possible, let's spend some time together and catch up on one another's stories.


With love,

Christine Bora Lee

So I ride

I've lost the use of my heart
But I'm still alive
Still looking for the life
The endless pool on the other side
It's a wild wild west
I'm doing my best

I'm at the borderline of my faith,
I'm at the hinterland of my devotion
In the frontline of this battle of mine
But I'm still alive.

EEEskuurt

My time in Nepal is rapidly coming to a close… sort of. Lots of uncertainty still left in the game with a fuel blockade on the India-Nepal border, causing a major shortage of petrol for vehicles and the potential for me to be flown to Kathmandu a bit earlier than originally planned. Eagerly waiting to hear the verdict, and so is my host-family with Dashain (like Christmas for Hinduism) coming up.

In the meantime, I’ve applied to my first job for my return! I’m looking into a few other postings and hopefully will be unemployed for only a short amount of time when I get back (in December—I bought my plane ticket home too!).

Onto the meaty stuff, my reflection:

As much as an over-analyzer and over-thinker I am--a quality I became aware of a few years back—I am finally taking steps to counteract it, or handle it in a more feel-good way. I’ve become largely aware of the fearlessness and confidence Nepalese people carry (most of them). Situations I often panic and stress over they mosey on through. When I think, plan plan plan! They think, I got this. And I’m starting to find a better, more comfortable balance between cautiousness and recklessness. Regardless of where it’s rooted from, I’ve been a “better safe than sorry” kinda gal for a long time, and I’m beginning to see the value and potential gains of taking more risks. It’s still scary, but I’m reassured by the rollercoaster this journey has been and I believe the truth in the saying, “We win some and we lose some”. Whatever happens, it doesn’t end there and we got to keep on rolling the dice and playing the game.

Today in and of itself was a roller coaster. Had some good moments (ate a Fiber One bar) and some bad moments (got nearly completely trampled on the bus) then another good moment (ate a boiled egg) then some more bad moments (tried to apply to a job then the internet cut out and lost my whole application then got stuck in the rain waiting for the bus) then some more good moments (made it home and finished my job application!) and now my butt is on my bed in shorts ready for sleep (a good moment) while the ants infiltrate my room (…yeah).

Anywho… the journey continues. On to the next one.

Love,

Bora

From 22 to 25

I’ve celebrated three birthdays while serving in Nepal and went from 22 to 25 years old. I’m whelmed with reflection thinking back at how Nepal has given me a place to evolve and grow. I’ve learned so much over the past two years and gained a bucketful of new memories—some interesting, scary, frustrating, defeating, breathtaking, meditative, amazing—all with exclamation marks.

I want to give thanks to everyone who’s supported me. To all who’ve sent me off with gifts, mailed a care package(s), sent letters, phone calls, words of kindness or thoughtful messages, you have all carried me to here. Whether our friendship is new or old, long or brief, I’m thankful for our relationship, and I’ll live to pass the love and kindness forward.

So, during my moment of introspection I reflected upon these life lessons learned.

1.       Take risks

We can only gain what we risk to take. It’s a phrase so easy to say, and so difficult to do sometimes. I’m not saying to gamble all your money away or go bungee jumping, but I believe there is much to gain from challenging yourself and building practice by taking one small risk every day. I’m neither saying the risk will always pay off. But by putting something you earnestly care for on the line—money, effort, time, your heart or your happiness—you invest in the outcome and it may make life that much more vibrant and meaningful.  

2.       Be vulnerable

 This goes alongside taking risks. Personally I have a knee-jerk reaction to vulnerability to always do the opposite. It’s frightening to let yourself open up to humiliation or heartache, yet, a life lived behind closed doors is not very fun either. Walls, too, can be important to have and it may not be wise to open up to everyone you meet, however, I believe life will find wholeness when you find ways to connect and to embrace vulnerability.

3.       Love yourself

 The two ideas above are easiest to do when paired with a deep, deep love for yourself. I’m not talking about a love based on selfishness or domination—the kind where others need to be lowered in order for you to feel higher. I’m talking about taking the love you have for your mother, father, best friend, role model or someone you admire, and seeing yourself in the same light. Treating yourself and believing in yourself the way you treat and believe in those you love, and anchoring that love towards you.

Shout out to all the Virgos, September babies, and September 11^th babies! Happiest birthdays to my partners!!!

Less than two months left in Nepal. The bittersweetness of another big life transition is underway.

Thank you all again for the well wishes on my birthday. I had an amazing day.

lovelovelove,

Christine Bora Lee

Chain of Fools

"May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy."

-http://www.upmoments.com/she-tells-her-grandma-that-shes-just-been-cheated-on/

The Safest Place

August 23^rd, 2015

I have been bouncing around hotels in Kathmandu for the past week, quietly searching for meaning and fulfillment for my days as the political protests and road closures continue throughout the country. Seven volunteers, including I, have been unable to return to our villages because of these road closures, or bandhs. Overall I’ve done a decent job of keeping busy and making the best out of my time, but today left me a little cracked. Anxiety about the road ahead—life beyond Peace Corps service—continues to rise to the surface and my life as a villager recedes to memory the longer I stay out of site. I find myself floating around in a murky sense of being.

I’m hopeful everything will work out. In the meantime I’m doing my best to tread through another life transition coming up very soon, full of important decisions and open doors, with a longing for guidance. 

At home in the world.

About an hour and a half ago I arrived back into Nepal after taking three weeks of vacation days traveling through Singapore, Malaysia and a bit of Thailand. Taking a deep breath, I'm trying to prepare myself and ease back into the lifestyle of my home in Nepal. 

A very brief summary of my trip (and feel free to comment or message me with questions if you are planning to visit any of these stops):

1. Singapore: Excellent public transportation, yummy and affordable street food and kaya spread is the sh*t, hotel/hostels are pricey but I recommend Green Kiwi on Lavender as a hostel option (~$25/night), Gardens by the Bay (at night) is beautiful, and Wednesdays is Girls Night Out (discounted/free drinks and entry at many bars). I was very sick for most of my time here, but the toilets around the country are of great quality :) .

2. Malaysia:
         a. Malacca/Melaka: I recommend taking the river cruise or walking along the river to see the art against the building walls, Jonker's Night Market on weekends has good street food and souvenirs, and poh piah lwee for nyonya food.
         b. Penang: My friend Jewels and I went to the Penang National Park which I recommend. Entry was free and there are many cool day hikes. Georgetown has lots of interesting street art and culture. We stayed at Roommates hostel which was in a great location and had great showers!
         c. Kuala Lumpur: The Petronas Towers are impressive. 
         d. Kuching: Very relaxed and easy-going with yummy street food in Chinatown. One of my favorite stops in Malaysia. There are many day trips out to nature from Kuching.

3. Thailand (Bangkok): Food food food I can't believe how much food exists here. Ayutthaya was beautiful (take time to ride a bike through the city) and the boat ride through amphawa floating market was fun. 

I will be in Kathmandu for a few days as there are bandhs, or road closures due to political protests and rallies throughout the country in opposition of decisions made in writing the country's constitution. In less than two weeks I will return to Kathmandu from Dang to attend my Close of Service (COS) conference, where the volunteers in my group, G200, and I will begin the end of our service: our last three months. 

My last day of service is on November 6th, 2015.